Seen a few people dealing with some haters in the last couple of weeks, so I thought I’d share some thoughts on the matter.
Tell your truth. Tell your absolute truth. You will get haters. Who cares? You care? OK, well, I get that, but it might help you to understand a bit more about why haters happen so that you don’t get too caught up in the spiky feels over it to move forward.
Why All The Hate?
Some of those haters are there because they disagree so strongly with you, and their egos are so tightly bound with their thoughts, that they can’t allow opposition to their world view. That’s OK. That’s where they are right now. Let them go and do their thing. They’ll either get past their egos enough to accept that they live in a world fullof different perspectives, or they’ll stay in toddler mode (and toddler mode can last for an entire lifetime, so don’t expect that they’re just not grown up yet. Many people lose childlike wonder, but never embrace the responsibility of becoming adults. They deserve your pity rather than your wrath. They miss all the good stuff). Either way, it’s their freewill to decide to evolve or not, so leave them be.
Some of them will hate you because you are strong enough to stand for something or to speak out, or to be yourself. That’s OK too. I’ve found that these people get into a fiery rage over the unfairness of things, point fingers, blame, etc, and then… eventually… get some courage. They then speak their truth. They then deal with the cost of doing so. They then return to me a few years later and apologise. Also part of the journey. This time, it’s the journey from fear based arrogance to wholehearted expression. It can take a while, but it’s a worthwhile journey, so be patient with these guys.
Some will hate because they can’t look at themselves. Actually, this is probably the largest group. I’ve found that these people can be triggered by being in the presence of someone with self-knowledge and confidence, or even by being in the presence of someone who sees the greatness within them. For these people, the idea of their own greatness is physically painful – even though they are sometimes arrogant pains in the rear on the surface. They simply lack the ability to love themselves, so you are a threat to them by either being able to love yourself or even by loving them. These are damaged people. They tend to attempt to destroy you in some way or other rather than looking within. Personally, I’d urge that you distance yourself from these people. You’ll meet them on your journey. You’ve no way of knowing which are just struggling with self image issues and which are actually just not able to process empathy. When dealing with the latter, you may stumble upon narcissists, sociopaths, and even psychopaths. Walk away. It’s not worth it. The people who are just temporarily in a self-disempowered state will seek you out again at a later date and be humble enough to tell you. The others are a drain on your resources, and will affect your ability to show up for the people who deserve to experience your unique skills.
Ditch The Hate: Feel The Love
All this said, there are so many people in the world waiting to hear your unique voice that is worth the risk of haters to be vulnerable and share your truth. There are people out there who will LOVE your message. You have no idea who it will help.
A song that might help you if you’re struggling with this is Falling Forward. Any of us who’ve succeeded online have been through what you’re going through. It’s worth it. Keep going. I believe in you.
Share The Love!
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